Thursday, June 24, 2004

Taking an idea from skippy the bush kangaroo, I have put up a poll on my sidebar. While he merely asked, in his inadequately capitalized way, "who would be the best candidate for john kerry's vice president?", I have decided to show how serious this question is by reminding you of what will happen if John Heinz-Kerry should actually win this fall. That's right, we're already drafting impeachment articles for perjury. Isn't a lie about heaving stars as important as one about having sex? I started the ballots rolling by helpfully voting for the person who would do the second most harm to John-boy's chances, She Who Must Not Be Named. Yes, I know Sharpton would scare even more voters into sticking with Our Noble Leader, but as Christopher Walken said in one of my favorite movies, "There are some things I don't do." To paraphrase the old Republican slogan from Reconstruction years, "Vote as you scoffed."

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