Wednesday, August 04, 2004


That is the traditional reaction to the news that a bus full of trial lawyers has gone over a cliff. It also applies to today's anniversary of the August 4, 1869, decree by Norton I, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico:
"Being desirous of allaying the dissensions of party strife now existing within our realm, [I] do hereby dissolve and abolish the Democratic and Republican parties, and also do hereby degree the disfranchisement and imprisonment, for not more than ten, nor less than five years, to all persons leading to any violation of this our imperial decree." --San Francisco Herald, August 4, 1869
Karl, are you listening? Fortunately, we didn't establish this kind of imperial rule under Saint Ronald. While Michael is a fine liberal-bashing patriot, he was adopted. Think about us suffering now under the Slayer of Stem Cells, Emperor Ron, Jr. But our current First Family offers much better prospects, now that the future Empress Jenna has begun campaigning for Our Noble Leader. She can also count on good advice from the Duke of Tallahassee.

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