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Monday, August 30, 2004

I GOT IT FROM GARY:

Millions of people have been foolish enough to start reading blogs. ("Here, kid, the first one's free!") An ever-growing number have endangered their futures by trying to start one of their own. ("I can quit anytime!") Unfortunately, a small subset of them have now manifested a genetic flaw which turns this idle hobby into a deadly addiction. ("Sorry, Brad darling, but I'm posting tonight!") There is hope, but it was revealed by a rather unexpected source.

One cultural remnant of the many movements in the sixties is Reason. It grew from little more than a Randite newsheet to the world's best known advocate of garbage privatization. Becoming a distant cousin of the establishment did have a seriously diluting effect on its sense of humor. But perhaps I misattribute satire. Maybe we were supposed to take seriously that early article proposing that Dagny Taggart should have formed a ménage à quatre with her three rapists lovers.

What the small-"L" libertarian periodical has never been accused of, before or after its escape from Santa Barbara, is compassionate concern for the helpless dregs of society -- such as those hooked obsessive bloggers. Yet now they have printed a transcript of an attempt to help this new category of social victims.
I'm sorry we had to deceive you. This is an intervention. My name is Dr. Wilson. Your friends, family, and coworkers asked me to be here; they're concerned about how your obsession with the election is affecting your life.

READER: What the hell? Hey -- dammit -- how come the "back" button isn't working?

YOUR BOSS: We had it disabled.

READER: That's enough of this. I'm turning on MSNBC.

DR. WILSON: We cut off the cable, too. So you don't have anywhere to go. Please stay and listen to us.

YOUR FATHER: We love you. We really care about you. This is for your own sake.
"It's funny because it's true." Read the whole sad tale at "The Vets' Case".

Just as the social disease of blogging itself is spread by a long chain of casual contacts, this was seen by me at The Owner's Manual, which found it at Neptunus Lex, which spotted it at OxBlog. Help make a better world by passing on the link to friend who never looks up from their keyboard.
"So the game is endless and ruthless: and there is merriment overhead, but it is very far away."

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